WARNING: This message is somewhat sexually graphic. If this offends you, you're
         in need of some Prosac.

                 REAL LIFE CYBER SEX

 Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart, What do you look like?
 Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels.  I work 
             out every day, I'm toned and perfect.  My measurements are 36-24-36.
             What do you look like?
 Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.  I wear glasses and I have on a pair of 
           blue sweatpants I just bought from Walmart.  I'm also wearing a T-shirt 
           with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner - it smells funny.
 Sweetheart: I want you.  Would you like to screw me?
 Wellhung: OK
 Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.  There's soft music playing on the stereo and 
             candles on my dresser and night table.  I'm looking up into your eyes, 
             smiling.  My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to 
             fondle your huge, swelling bulge.

 Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
 Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.  
 Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.  My hands are trembling.
 Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
 Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
 Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.  The cool silk slides off my 
             warm skin.  I'm rubbing you bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
 Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rip a hole in your 
           blouse, I'm sorry.
 Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
 Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
 Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.  I'm wearing a lacy black bra.  My soft breasts 
             are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
 Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.  I think it's stuck.  Do you 
           have any scissors?
 Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.  I'm reaching back undoing the 
             clasp.  The bra slides off my body The air caresses my breast.  My 
             nipples are erect for you.
 Wellhung: how did you do that?  I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
 Sweetheart: I'm arching my back.  Oh baby.  I just want to feel you tongue all 
             over me.
 Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra.  Now I'm licking your, you know breasts.  
           They're neat!
 Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair.  Now I'm nibbling your ear.
 Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze.  Your breast are covered with spit and phlegm.
 Sweetheart: What?
 Wellhung: I'm so sorry; Really.
 Sweetheart I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
 Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you.  I drop it with a .
 Sweetheart OK.  I'm pulling your sweatpants down and rubbing your hard tool.
 Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman.  Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
 Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt.  Take off my panties.
 Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties.  My tongue is going all over, in and out 
           nibbling on you...umm...wait a minute.
 Sweetheart: What's the matter?
 Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat.  I'm choking.
 Sweetheart Are you OK?
 Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit.  I'm turning all red.
 Sweetheart: Can I help?
 Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly.  I'm fumbling through the 
           cabinets, looking for a cup.  Where do you keep your cups?
 Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
 Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water.  There, that's better.
 Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
 Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
 Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
 Wellhung: I'm drying the cup.  Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet.  And now 
           I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost.
           Where's the bedroom?
 Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
 Wellhung: I found it.
 Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants.  I'm moaning.  I want you so badly.
 Wellhung: Me too.
 Sweetheart: Your pants are off.  I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies 
             pressing each other.
 Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face.  It hurts. 
 Sweetheart Why don't you take off your glasses?
 Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them.  I place the glasses 
           on the night table.
 Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed.  Give it to me, baby!
 Wellhung: I have to pee.  I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and 
           toward the bathroom.
 Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
 Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark.  I'm feeling around for the toilet.
           I lift the lid. 
 Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
 Wellhung: I'm done going.  I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't 
           find it. Uh-oh!
 Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
 Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper.  Sorry again.  
           I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way. 
 Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
 Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know 
           woman's thing.
 Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
 Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt.  It feels so nice.  I kiss your neck.  
           Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
 Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning.  I can't stand it another 
             second! Slide in!  Screw me now!
 Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
 Sweetheart: What?
 Wellhung:  I'm limp.  I can't sustain an erection.
 Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around an incredulous look on my face.
 Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy.  I'm 
           going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
 Sweetheart: No, never mind.  I'm getting dressed.  I'm putting on my underwear.
             Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
 Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm 
           feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, 
           picture frames and your candles.
 Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse.  Now I'm putting on my shoes.
 Wellhung: I've found my glasses.  I'm putting them on.  My God!  One of your 
           candles fell on the curtain.  The curtain is on fire!  I'm pointing at 
           it, a shocked look on my face.
 Sweetheart: Go to hell.  I'm logging off, you loser!
 Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!