45 year-old Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a 
 mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of marijuana were packed in 
 the engine compartment of the car which she had brought to the mechanic 
 for an oil change.  According to police, Brasher later said that she 
 didn't realize that the mechanic would have to raise the hood to change 
 the oil.
 Portsmouth, R.I. Police charged Gregory Rosa, 25, with a string of 
 vending machine robberies in January when he (1) fled from police 
 inexplicably when they spotted him loitering around a vending machine 
 and (2) later tried to post his $400 bail in coins.
 Karen Lee Joachimmi, 20, was arrested in Lake City, Florida for robbery 
 of a Howard Johnson's motel.  She was armed with only an electric chain 
 saw, which was not plugged in.
 The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger 
 King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 7:50am, flashed a gun and demanded cash. 
 The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash 
 register without a food order.  When the man ordered onion rings, the 
 clerk said they weren't available for breakfast.  The man, frustrated, 
 walked away.
 David Posman, 33, was arrested recently in Providence, R.I, after 
 allegedly knocking out an armored car driver and stealing the closest 
 four bags of money.  It turned out they contained $800 in PENNIES, 
 weighed 30 pounds each, and slowed him to a stagger during his getaway 
 so that police officers easily jumped him from behind.
 The Belgium news agency Belga reported in November that a man suspected 
 of robbing a jewelry store in Liege said he couldn't have done it 
 *because he was busy breaking into a school at the same time.* Police 
 then arrested him for breaking into the school.
 Drug-possession defendant Christopher Johns, on trial in March in 
 Pontiac, Michigan, said he had been searched without a warrant.  The 
 prosecutor said the officer didn't need a warrant because a "bulge" in 
 Christopher's jacket could have been a gun.  Nonsense, said Christopher, 
 who happened to be wearing the same jacket that day in court. He handed 
 it over so the judge could see it.  The judge discovered a packet of 
 cocaine in the pocket and laughed so hard he required a five-minute 
 recess to compose himself.
 Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz gave himself five-inch-long welts in 
 March when he tried to iron his polo shirt while wearing it.  "I've 
 ironed that way five or six times," he said, "and never had it happen."
 Dave so-and-so of Anniston, Alabama, was injured recently after he 
 attempted to replace a tubelike fuse in his Chevy pickup with a 
 22-caliber rifle bullet (used because it was a perfect fit).  However, 
 when electricity heated the bullet, it went off and shot him in the