Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his
 crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew
 became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me
 my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red
 shirt, which the captain put on and led the crew to battle the
 pirate boarding party. Although some casualties occurred among the
 crew, the pirates were repelled.
 Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate
 vessels sending boarding parties. The crew cowered in fear, but the
 captain, calm as ever bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once
 again the battle was on.  However, the Captain and his crew repelled
 both boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred.
 Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night
 recounting the day's occurrences when an ensign looked to the
 Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before
 the battle?"
 The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give,
 exhorted, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show
 the wound and thus, you men will continue to fight unafraid."
 The men sat in silence marveling at the courage of such a man. As
 dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were
 pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way.
 The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for
 his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me
 my brown pants!"